Micro Stories

Got great hand-eye coordination? Here's the place to show it off. You can also upload your work (images, audio, and video) and view our fan art gallery (currently defunct, bug forum management to fix it).
This is also the forum for all of you blossoming Camus' to exercise your brain power by writing and posting fan fiction.
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Spazmo
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Post by Spazmo »

Where'd you buy the eyebrows?
How appropriate. You fight like a cow.

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Naked_Lunch

Post by Naked_Lunch »

part two of three or something :aiee: :aiee:

The boat cruised along the waters, churning the waves with a rythmic hum. Could put a man to sleep, but I had no time for sleep. I had to be vigiliant, I had to be awake and make sure I had all my sense. This wasn't going to be easy, but it was going to be worth it.

"Land ho!" The captain cried and thrust his hook northwards.

I stretched my hand across my forehead, shielding my eyes from the viscious Norwegian sun.

"My God," I heard myself exclaim, "It's even worse than I could ever imagine!"

Smoke rose in huge columns of dust and death, a warning to any misguided traveller. Even from out at see I could still hear the crackling roar of the devastating fires, the scream of innocent women being massacred and children weeping as their fathers were throwing into a squirming pit of gay sex and death.

I cocked my shotgun, no ammo in it but it was a ritual thing. I nodded to the captain. He unscrewed his hook and put on a chainsaw. He then ripped off the rubber mask that covered his face.

"Ready to do this, mang?" He said, taking of all his clothes.

"I was fucken born ready, Pat." and I shoved my cock in. He squealed with delight, like a pig, a strangely sexual pig.

We fucked until the night faded and the sun rose, smiling on my tired cock, slimy with sweat and butt juice.

I bid Pat farewell and dived headfirst into the freezing ocean, I felt bad to leave my friend behind but now is the time for heroes and heroes act alone.

I swam for a good two hours, the salt water splashing in my face, it was rough like anal sex and I had to fight to stay above. As I drew nearer to the coast, I saw more and more dead fish floating, and then as I got even closer I saw bodies of soldiers, nurses, hookers, everything. It was a massacre. As I passed by the last soldier, dying and slowly drowning I gave him a :salute: and with all his energy left in him, he saluted me back. "Godspeed, brother...

"Godspeed."

The beaches were empty, and the pictaresque villages that lined the Stavanger coast were hauntingly silent and still. The flames still roared by the screams had faded away, not completely gone but now just part of the background noise of this macarbre puppet theatre of scandinavian bloodshed.

The waves were washing up bodies of the fallen and I couldn't help but wish I had some time to dig each one their worthy grave. But if there was one thing I did have not enough of, it was time and time is the most dangerous weapon.

I tightened my bandanna, it was gonna be a rough ride and I'd hate to lose the only thing left that was truly mine and not some goddamn goverment supplied piece o' shit. It reminded me of the old days, back when we fought because we believed, not because we had to. That was real war, this is real war and I'm glad to have it back...
Last edited by Naked_Lunch on Fri Jan 20, 2006 10:08 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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VasikkA
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Post by VasikkA »

I think it's better than that Caribs piece of shit.
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Nicolai
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Post by Nicolai »

I don't look like that either. D:


Maybe I'll post a new picture one day. One day.
Naked_Lunch

Post by Naked_Lunch »

Fixed it B)
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S4ur0n27
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Post by S4ur0n27 »

VasikkA wrote:I think it's better than that Caribs piece of shit.
Agreed :joy:
Naked_Lunch

Post by Naked_Lunch »

argh u people post some stories dammit :chainsaw:
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S4ur0n27
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Post by S4ur0n27 »

Not until you change your avatar and location.
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Post by Naked_Lunch »

what's wrong with them?
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POOPERSCOOPER
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Post by POOPERSCOOPER »

I like your avatar, the kids expression is realworld gritty and badass. Good job on the stories, too.
Naked_Lunch

Post by Naked_Lunch »

Thanks poop, I can always count on a true patriot like you. :salute:
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Nicolai
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Post by Nicolai »

He looks like a younger version of that guy from Red Dwarf. D:
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S4ur0n27
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Post by S4ur0n27 »

He looks like Josh Hartnett with braces.
Naked_Lunch

Post by Naked_Lunch »

WRITE MORE STORIES swell guy >:(
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Redeye
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Post by Redeye »

Foreign Policy: Wow 'Em With Untruths

Karen Hughes, the administration's latest goodwill ambassador, as quoted in Salon:

"Many people around the world do not understand the important role that faith plays in Americans' lives," she said. When an Egyptian opposition leader inquired why President Bush mentions God in his speeches, she asked him "whether he was aware that previous American presidents have also cited God, and that our Constitution cites 'one nation under God.' He said, 'Well, never mind.'"

- Fact one: The phrase is not actually in the Constitution, anywhere.

- Fact two: The framers took great care to exclude such language.

- Fact three: "One nation under God" is part of the pledge of allegiance.

- Fact four: The 'under God' part wasn't added until 1954, by a Cold-War-obsessed Congress seeking to underline America's moral superiority.

- Fact five: The extra two words go against the intent of the man who wrote the pledge, Francis Bellamy.

- Fact six: The addition "under God" violates the spirit of the pledge; few things could be more divisive than -- in a pledge about what unites us -- bringing up religion.

But, you know, "never mind."
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Spazmo
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Post by Spazmo »

Naked_Lunch wrote:WRITE MORE STORIES swell guy >:(
How about you write one first?
How appropriate. You fight like a cow.

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Naked_Lunch

Post by Naked_Lunch »

I wrote one in IRC today. You were too busy ogling the librarian to notice :(
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Spazmo
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Post by Spazmo »

IRC doesn't count. As a medium, it's as ephemeral and fleeting as even the juiciest of farts. Only the DAC fanfic forum can allow you to permanently enshrine your works in glory.

Also, your story sucked anyways.
How appropriate. You fight like a cow.

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Naked_Lunch

Post by Naked_Lunch »

You need faith, Spazmo. That's what you need.

Oh, and pooper liked my story and that's all that counts in my book
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S4ur0n27
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Post by S4ur0n27 »

I'd paste some, but they're in french D:
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