Who here has half-assed retarded gamers?

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Janus Matchell
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Who here has half-assed retarded gamers?

Post by Janus Matchell »

My players are ok as a group but for the most part they don't think outside the box. And by that I mean they recycle the same character concepts don't really ROLEPLAY they ROLLPLAY and for some reason like being stat whoring primadonna swell guy. They can't seem to think about anything beside killing NPC's and destroying all they can. Now of course I don't let it slide they have a large list of enemies that will catch up with them. But enough of my complaining hows about some of yours I want to here what you all have to say about half-assed retarded gamers.
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Janus Matchell
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wth

Post by Janus Matchell »

Ok wth!!! I know you people here have got to have at least encountered stupid assgamers at least once in your lifetimes. Now please give me your opinions here.
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Post by Blargh »

Janus, I believe you should consider the worth of pre-emptive euthanasia with regard to these . . people. They sound barely worthy of the privilege of fresh oxygen, you could stand to make quite a profit from this course of action at your local restaurant of non-existent ethical standards. Remember, recycling is a good thing.

If that's not your cup of tea, perhaps there exists some minor amusement to be experienced through gradually making their 'game' entirely unbearable through ridiculous difficulty ? Munchkins can only cope with so much, after all. :drunk:
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Post by Janus Matchell »

Blargh wrote:Janus, I believe you should consider the worth of pre-emptive euthanasia with regard to these . . people. They sound barely worthy of the privilege of fresh oxygen, you could stand to make quite a profit from this course of action at your local restaurant of non-existent ethical standards. Remember, recycling is a good thing.

If that's not your cup of tea, perhaps there exists some minor amusement to be experienced through gradually making their 'game' entirely unbearable through ridiculous difficulty ? Munchkins can only cope with so much, after all. :drunk:
Wow you have said what I was trying but failed miserably to say. I know of course that the only way to kill Munchkin is to give them something they can't handle or destroy their toys. As for the recycling of characters for the most part they the "I can only have fun if I ruin a good time for the other players asshole type of character" or the ever lovely "KILLKILLKILL type or character" As far as role-playing is concerned with them they are like "insert cliche overly done shitty action movie dialogue quote here" and then they kill the NPC's I work so hard on to make interesting. For the most part I have been on the lookout for new players to replace the retarded ones as to open a window of freshness. So far no luck.
Ignore my warnings and pay no heed then your live will be ended shortly indeed!
Janus Matchell
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Post by Janus Matchell »

Blargh wrote:Janus, I believe you should consider the worth of pre-emptive euthanasia with regard to these . . people. They sound barely worthy of the privilege of fresh oxygen, you could stand to make quite a profit from this course of action at your local restaurant of non-existent ethical standards. Remember, recycling is a good thing.

If that's not your cup of tea, perhaps there exists some minor amusement to be experienced through gradually making their 'game' entirely unbearable through ridiculous difficulty ? Munchkins can only cope with so much, after all. :drunk:
Wow you have said what I was trying but failed miserably to say. I know of course that the only way to kill Munchkin is to give them something they can't handle or destroy their toys. As for the recycling of characters for the most part they the "I can only have fun if I ruin a good time for the other players asshole type of character" or the ever lovely "KILLKILLKILL type or character" As far as role-playing is concerned with them they are like "insert cliche overly done shitty action movie dialogue quote here" and then they kill the NPC's I work so hard on to make interesting. For the most part I have been on the lookout for new players to replace the retarded ones as to open a window of freshness. So far no luck.
Ignore my warnings and pay no heed then your live will be ended shortly indeed!
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Post by Janus Matchell »

sorry about the spam.
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Post by atoga »

Most of my players are into the whole combat thing and are basically incapable of roleplaying as is typical. However, the thing that gets me the most is that they don't pay attention to the game. Whenever I present a mystery to them they are incapable of following leads in order to solve it and being resourceful taking matters in their own hands and creating their own leads. Furthermore they don't seem to know the meaning of "red herring" because they take everything I say at face value - why would the GM want to trick them?

I have one player who can sort of attempt to roleplay and solve this stuff, but only if I'm hanging the clues right in front of his ugly gamer head. Argh.
Last edited by atoga on Wed Aug 18, 2004 12:30 pm, edited 1 time in total.
suppose you're thinking about a plate of shrimp. suddenly somebody will say like 'plate' or 'shrimp' or 'plate of shrimp', out of the blue, no explanation.
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Post by Blargh »

Janus Matchell wrote:As for the recycling of characters /snip
We might not be on the exact same page here, I was referring to disposing of the morons and then cashing in on their organs and/or meat through appropriate means, i.e : McDonalds. This approach is probably not the best available, even though it might be the most satisfying.

If I weren't able to extract legitimate joy from tormenting idiots, I would feel immense sadness regarding the situation you have described.
Janus Matchell wrote:For the most part I have been on the lookout for new players to replace the retarded ones as to open a window of freshness. So far no luck.
Aside from the ecstasy of fucking with their atrophied brains and their game to the point of unending frustration on their part, that is all you really can do. Good luck.

@ atoga - a painful situation, how exactly do you cope with their ignorance ? :drunk:
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Post by atoga »

atoga wrote:@ atoga - a painful situation, how exactly do you cope with their ignorance ?
I either make a boring, easy, hack-happy adventure, or I end up pissing them off after they spend a few futile hours trying to make sense of what's going on. Eventually I give them really obvious hints or I just devise a way for the clue to directly fall into their hands. Fortunately, like most people, I consume a ridiculous amount of caffeine and sugar units throughout the course of any gaming session, so that helps me get by.
suppose you're thinking about a plate of shrimp. suddenly somebody will say like 'plate' or 'shrimp' or 'plate of shrimp', out of the blue, no explanation.
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man

Post by Janus Matchell »

That is usually what I have to do to get them into the action. Sometimes however it is as if I am babysitting retards. Plot is one thing I am constantly working on along with the environment and the situations they put themselves in with regards to NPC's and other factors such as what race they are but then again they do it to themselves. I finally got a chick role-player to come to one of our sessions once and the rest of the party scared her off. They smelt bad, had a strong lack of manners and generally showered her with the "lemme stare at your boobs" attention. I was so embarassed.
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Post by atoga »

Brutal killings of the PCs aside, you don't sound like that bad of a GM. You've certainly got the atmosphere thing down, by the sounds of it. Too bad about the chick though - gamers tend to be bad with that.
suppose you're thinking about a plate of shrimp. suddenly somebody will say like 'plate' or 'shrimp' or 'plate of shrimp', out of the blue, no explanation.
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i know

Post by Janus Matchell »

Chick gamers are a rare resource just like uranium. I had one I used to game with and she was damn cool but when I introduced her to my other friends she black listed me as if I were a nazi or a communist. About player killings I had no intention on killing them but they rolled bad and rolled good. Except for the instance of Alvin who Had tagged finesse, gifted and a good melee weapons skill. In fact I rolled max damage which is rare for me in any game sessions as usually it is I roll bad players roll good.
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